Let’s all celebrate March

They say the older you get the faster time seems to go and that certainly seems to be the case for Ol’ Dutch and Miss Trixie. And poor Mr. Cooper, the Yorkie, really sees it fly by as one dog year is the equivalent to seven human ones.

But regardless of if you are measuring yours in human or dog times, this past week seemed to fly by. And here we are faced with Saint Patrick’s Day and Easter staring us down like our Jr. High math teacher Mrs. Girdle who earned her name for showing just a tad too much foundation in the classroom.

Of course, Mardi Gras came roaring by last week, celebrating Fat Tuesday when you are supposed to eat up all the good stuff in the house in preparation for Lent and its fasting time ahead.

From what I can see, however, most people celebrated it by consuming large quantities of liquor and losing their clothes, which I guess the latter does at least show more fat for all the world to see.

Not a winebibber myself, I was told that it is to be consumed to cleanse the palate between different courses of a meal. That way the next bite you take is clean and you can thoroughly enjoy it. But from what I can see, it may be the reason that people invented 12-course meals so they can imbibe more of the liquid grape.

The issue seems to be that soon people just do away with the eating part of the whole process and begin to just cleanse their palates liberally. This then leads to them shedding clothes displaying copious amounts of skin and padding and suddenly a new meaning is given to Fat Tuesday.

But if that doesn't seem to interest you there are myriad other important dates to be celebrated in March including such things as — Asset Management Awareness Month, Developmental Disabilities Awareness Month, Endometriosis Awareness Month, Irish-American Heritage Month, Multiple Sclerosis Awareness Month, National Athletic Training Month, National Brain Injury Awareness Month and last but certainly not least, National Breast Implant Awareness Month.

I am not sure how people get those things on a list to be honored and/or celebrated but about every day of the year is taken up with some kind of cause or awareness date. And after reading through the list of those dates there are certainly some of those worthy of our attention of the plights of others who suffer from disabilities or illnesses.

And as you know, Ol’ Dutch ever the caring and concerned person that he is, is always willing to lend a hand to those in need so this month I am volunteering to help out with the National Breast Implant Awareness celebration. Nothing like lending a hand to something so important is what I say. And Ol’ Dutch is so concerned about this particular cause he may just lend two hands to help out the needy.

I am not sure if it's a celebration akin to Mardi Gras, but I think they have maybe joined together to bring attention to that frontal feature from the looks of things on the TV.

I don't know about you but having just gotten past National Cheetos Day on the 4th, as soon as I can get rid of these orange fingers, I am going to help out those poor women in need of attention to their blossoming plight.

Miss Trixie has been quick to point out that she does not need any help in that department to the disappointment of Ol’ Dutch but the eye-rolling she is afflicted with has started again.

Maybe she needs a day of her own for Eye Rolling Awareness Month. I am sure there are millions of suffering women out there who are afflicted with this same disease. There has to be as there are that many married women out there.

Kevin Kirkpatrick and his Yorkie, Cooper, fish, hunt, ATV or hike daily. His email is [email protected]. Additional news can be found at www.troutrepublic.com.